Choosing the right wedding vendor for your couple is extremely important and can be not so easy. But it’s even more significant and liable for a same-sex wedding because some non-typical issues often arise. You might face sensitive conversations and misunderstandings while communicating with vendors, but don’t worry – a lot of heterosexual couples have their own issues with wedding vendors, their challenges are just different. To help you pick the best and most suitable vendor for your LGBTQIA+ wedding, we offer you several useful pieces of advice.
Ideally, vendor should have experience with LGBTQIA+ couples
There are vendors that already have some experience with same-sex couples and it is easier for them to work with you. Besides, you can find feedback online or talk with couples who have hired this particular vendor. But this option isn’t always available. If you live in a small town or in a country with strong traditions that don’t encourage same-sex marriages, then you might not find an experienced vendor. So, don’t be afraid of those wedding vendors who are new to LGBTQIA+ weddings – it doesn’t mean they can’t do their job with you. Just be honest and upfront with a potential vendor from the beginning and articulate your thoughts and fears.
Pick your vendors thoroughly
Choosing the right wedding vendor for your couple is extremely important. But it’s even more significant and liable for a same-sex wedding because some not typical issues arise. For example, how your wedding photographer or videographer will pick the poses for your wedding pictures and videos. Non-traditional couples often can’t use the same poses as traditional bride&groom couples – they don’t feel comfortable or don’t look natural posing like that. And there is one more rather sensitive issue – if a photographer is personally against same-sex marriages, it might show, he or she might subconsciously create photos that will be far from perfect. It’s not intentional, but it just happens sometimes.
So, interview your wedding vendors thoroughly before you book them, ask questions about their attitude to LGBTQIA+ couples, try to catch their emotions to understand if you can trust them with your wedding.
Communicate with your vendor
As we’ve already said, some issues that arise during the non-traditional same-sex wedding prep might be new for a wedding vendor, so communicate with them. For instance, there are families that don’t support their gay or lesbian relatives and won’t come to the wedding. Warn your photographer in advance so that there were no surprises there and the vendor could think about alternative poses for the family photos. If you hire a wedding planner, this person should know everything about your situation to plan the event perfectly and according to your personalized experiences or even family drama. Don’t be shy or ashamed of your situation, every couple has its own peculiarities and dramas.
Unfortunately, you have to be ready for becoming tired of conversations on touchy subjects with people who don’t get it. If this happens, it would be good to have someone to talk with vendors on your behalf, like your partner or some family member or friend. This will help you loosen the stress a bit and give yourself time to emotionally recover from unpleasant conversations. Planning a wedding is always stressful, it’s ok to get tired of it.
Be especially considerate with picking dj and wedding officiant
These two people talk on your behalf at the wedding, so it’s important what they will be saying. When you’re picking the officiant, make sure this person takes your union seriously and respects your choice to have a same-sex marriage. Obviously, some religious officiants might be against an LGBTQIA+ wedding. But there are plenty of people, priests including, who will be happy to serve as your wedding officiant, you just have to find the right person.
With dj, it’s a bit easier. Most artists are not as conservative as religious leaders, so they will probably accept your personal life choices easily. But sometimes, a dj, wanting to be humorous and funny, might make jokes about your sexual orientation that you prefer not to use at your wedding. To avoid this, you should talk with your dj beforehand and tell him or her which topics you don’t want them to touch. Just to make sure you won’t feel embarrassed or uncomfortable in front of your close family and friends.