A wedding vow is a must-have in many countries and wedding ceremony styles. Sometimes, the couples don’t bother too much and just find a nice example of the vow on the internet, which is absolutely fine. But there are brides and grooms who prefer to write their own wedding vows. And that’s where problems often begin)). How to create a perfect vow? What to start with? Where to get inspiration? Should a vow be more intimate or rather restrained because your wedding guests will hear it all? So, let’s find some answers and also find out how to write the best wedding vow for your couple.
Creating unique wedding vows isn’t obligatory, of course, so you don’t have to do it. Only if you both want to. Otherwise, you’re welcome to take one of the classic vows and be done with it.
Though, if you still decide on writing your own wedding vows, you can use a template from the internet or ask your wedding planner for a piece of advice. If you don’t have a wedding planner, there is plenty of info on the internet. Read some examples and templates, they’ll help you understand your own personal preferences.
But even before that, talk to your fiance or fiancee. Determine what kind of vows you both want: short and simple or long and creative, classic or in a certain style, traditional or unique, funny or romantic, etc. You would want both your vows to be written in one style so that they fit together. If your partner doesn’t want to create his/her own vow and you do, don’t force him/her, try not to fight over as simple thing as a vow. You can write yours and your beloved person can take a ready-made one – most of the guests (if not all of them) won’t even notice. And remember, if a person doesn’t want to create a vow, it certainly doesn’t mean that he/she doesn’t love you.
How long a wedding vow should last? The wedding planners recommend to give about 2-3 minutes for a vow, but it’s up to you how long to talk. If you feel like saying just a few words or making a whole speech, go for it – it’s your wedding after all. Though, too long wedding vows may tire your guests.
How to make your wedding vows personalized? Sit down and think your relationships through. Find some important events, things that determine you as a couple, remember funny and romantic occasions, etc. Write down in short everything you consider important so that you could use it in your vow later. It’s much easier to write any text when you have theses or focal points. And such info will make your vow unique and personalized.
Where to get inspiration for your wedding vow? That’s easy. What you love about your partner. What traits of your loved one’s character drive you crazy but, at the same time, it’s what makes him/her so special. What keeps you two together. What difficulties you have overcome to be a couple. First thing that comes to your mind when you think about your fiance or fiancee. Why you want to be together for the rest of your life. Your love story. These are only a few ideas for you.
When to write the vow? Ideally, the best time to finish working on your wedding vow is about 3-4 weeks before the wedding, so you have to start earlier. That’s the deadline. The last month before your wedding ceremony will, most probably, be so busy that you won’t have time for writing vows.
What focal points a vow should contain? Of course, these are just suggestions, you’re free to use them or not in your own vow. Still, here are things that are great to be included in your wedding vow:
- your love story (a few words about the path you’ve come together);
- a few compliments to your loved one (tell him/her and all of the guests why you love your partner, what are the best traits of your future spouse, etc.);
- promise (voice your promises and vows. It doesn’t have to be serious – little things you promise to do for your loved one);
- final big vow (the main vow, like “I promise to always love and protect you” or your variant. Make it a culmination of your wedding vow).
After finishing your wedding vow, put it aside for a few hours or even days. And then, give it a fresh look – you may see some little things you want to change or improve to make the vow perfect.
The next thing is practicing your wedding vow. Read it aloud a few times to make it sound fluent and sincere. Especially if you’re nervous when speaking in public. This will also help you to see how long the reading of your vow takes, how it sounds, and so on. If you still want to change something, do it.
Just to make sure your vow is great, you can choose a friend or close relative and read the vow to him. Another person might see the details you’ve missed. Or he can compliment your efforts and you’ll be certain that everything sounds perfect.
Only after all these stages, you can be sure that your wedding vow is perfect for your wedding. Don’t forget to write the final variant of your vow on a cute card to take it with you to the wedding. We highly advise you not to rely on your memory too much because weddings are nervous, busy, eventful, and emotional. You may forget your vow and ruin the moment. It’s not embarrassing to use a card – it would be more embarrassing to forget the wedding vow during the ceremony.
So, good luck with your wedding vows and take care of your loved ones.